Next in The Charge from Brendon Burchard, he mentions caring.
It’s here that I feel like Brendon has this strange idea about basic human drives. It seems that Brendon expects people to naturally and normally want not to be SLIM. This isn’t really my experience at all.
I actually had a conversation just a couple minutes ago with someone on Facebook who told me that it’s basically my fault that nobody promoted my last product, because when I asked them to promote it and they said “yes” they were actually lying.
This is the kind of garbage that I see all day long. People saying crap like “if someone lies to you and you believe them, then you are the one with the problem because people are liars and that is just fine because fuck you.”
But Brendon says that we all have this drive to care about other people. That our brains are designed in a way that makes it easy for us to care about others and to understand how they’re feeling. And I believe this is absolute bullshit.
Our brains are designed like every other animal’s – in a way that makes it easy for us to hunt our prey. You can tell humans are predators, because our eyes are on the front of our heads. That’s something only predators have. Prey have eyes on the sides of their head. Wolves and lions are predators, with eyes on the front of their head so they can identify and focus on their prey. Horses and cattle are prey, with eyes on the sides of their head so they can see predators coming from more directions.
It just so happens that our natural prey is, well, each other.
We’re not designed to understand other human beings because we’re supposed to comfort and support one another, but because we’re supposed to outwit and outsmart one another. We are all just natural fuckwads who only care about ourselves.
And what Brendon is doing here is confusing the idea that humans can be more than this… with the idea that we are naturally more than this. He takes this weird, counterintuitive position that makes no fucking sense: left to their own devices, people will act like dicks because nobody is there to show them their natural and normal capacity to not be dicks.
If someone has to show you, then it’s not natural.
Natural just happens. That’s the thing about nature; it just happens, whether you show anybody anything or not. And all the evidence is that people are naturally dicks. We don’t care about one another. It is, in fact, natural for us to regard the rest of humanity as defective versions of ourselves. We judge the value of others based on how alike we are. This is how we’ve behaved for centuries, and the self-help movement hasn’t changed doodly squat about it.
Yeah, we’re designed to understand how others are feeling. But it’s not so we can commiserate with them. It’s so we know when to fuck them, when to kill them, and when they’re not looking so we can take their shit.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that’s right. I’m saying that’s natural. We’re animals, basically, and we have animal drives for animal things. What makes us different than the animals is that we’re aware of these drives and can defy them.
Some would say this makes us better than the animals, but it’s just another case of “everyone else is a defective version of me” if you regard animals as defective humans – or, biblically, as defective women. There’s no objective good or bad and right or wrong, any more than there’s objective virtue or sin. Even the seven deadlies – greed, wrath, sloth, gluttony, vanity, pride, and lust… are only sins once you cross a certain line.
Because they’re not just natural. They’re actually unavoidable. We’re hard-wired for those behaviours.